Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
COCAINE IS GR8
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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