Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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