You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize