Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
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