no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
