ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
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I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
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Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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