As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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