i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
