That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
