How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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