Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
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