Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
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Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
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He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.