I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
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Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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