There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I need help removing her.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
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She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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