at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
