This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
