this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize