Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
