But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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