the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
