its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
They have beer where we have blood.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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