Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
