Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize