Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Randomize
