Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I think I just sharted jello shots
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