Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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