in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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