Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize