We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I forget how to act sober
Randomize