You made me cry and you don't even care
Ketchup is God's man juice
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
