Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Never underestimate the power of titties
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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