That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize