Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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