What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Mom said you looked used
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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