I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
