i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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