We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
