I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
