Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
