My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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