ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
