no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
