there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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