Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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