Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
