wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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