I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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