I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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