hotel room ftw
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize