Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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